(A funny but painfully true story about why most companies keep losing in sales)
Last week, I visited a company let’s call them GoalGetters Pvt Ltd.
The CEO called me, sounding frustrated:
“Jerry, I think we need a serious sales training. My team is failing to bring results! We might have to fire the Sales Manager.”
Ah, I’ve heard that song before.
The Blame Game Begins
When I arrived, I asked to see their sales reports.
They handed me a notebook not a CRM dashboard, not even an Excel sheet just a dog-eared, coffee-stained notebook.
I asked, “So how do you track leads?”
They said, “We write them here.”
“How do you follow up?”
“We just remember.”
“How are the targets set?”
“They’re discussed in meetings, but we don’t write them down.”
And the best part? Their salespeople were using personal phones, no email signatures, and marketing hadn’t run a single campaign since the 2023 elections.
Yet, they wanted to fire the sales team.
Enter ZIFA
I laughed and said,
“My brother, this situation reminds me of ZIFA.”
Imagine ZIFA sitting in a boardroom saying,
“Gentlemen, the Warriors are failing! Let’s fire the coach!”
But hold up he team has no stadium in Zimbabwe.
They have to borrow stadiums from South Africa just to play home matches.
Players train on rough pitches, some travel by bus for 20 hours before a match, and the allowances? Let’s not even go there.
Then after all that, ZIFA says:
“The coach is the problem!”
Really? Or is it the system?
Scene 3: Companies and ZIFA Are Cousins
Most companies are just like ZIFA.
They keep changing coaches I mean, sales teams without fixing the real issues:
- The sales process is broken.
- There’s no CRM to track leads.
- Marketing and sales don’t talk it’s like Manchester United’s defense and midfield.
- No incentives, no reviews, no accountability.
- And the boss wants “miracle sales” from unmotivated staff.
You can bring Pep Guardiola or Klopp to that team, but without a stadium, even Messi will refuse to play.
The Real Diagnosis
I told the CEO,
“Your problem is not the coach. It’s the pitch, the management, the strategy, and the system.”
Before training, we need to do a Sales Assessment
Check if your people have tools, if your structure makes sense, if your marketing supports sales, and if your leadership has a clear scoreboard.
Because firing your salespeople before fixing your system is like ZIFA blaming the coach when the Warriors are renting stadiums in Johannesburg.
The Moral of the Story
Before you fire your sales team
Fix your stadium.
Before you hire a new coach
Build your system.
Before you shout “We need motivation!”
Create the right environment to win.
In sales, just like in football, you don’t win by shouting louder. You win by building better. “You can’t train confusion. You fix confusion then you train.”
By The Chartered Vendor
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